Muted- Martin C.

I iron my smile into safe shapes,

tuck my weird behind polite nods.

Every version of me

goes through customs

before it leaves my mouth.

I delete messages before I send them.

Re-type.

Re-word.

Re-hide.

Just in case “me” is too loud

for the quiet everyone seems to want.

They say “be yourself”

but they mean

be yourself™,

just the marketable kind.

The chill kind.

The cool-guy-who-doesn’t-care kind.

But I care.

Too much, probably.

About everything.

And it shows in the way

I over-explain

and laugh at the wrong time

and like things too hard

too fast

too obviously.

So I water myself down

into something easier to hold—

just enough flavor to pass as real,

not enough to leave a taste.

And yeah,

sometimes I wonder

if I even remember

what I’d sound like

if I wasn’t trying

so hard

not to echo.